Alex now carries cash with her at all times

I went to pick up Alex from softball practice the other night, Dan sent me a text asking me to stop and get milk while I was out.  I loaded up Alex’s gear (have a catcher they said… it’ll be fun they said… her bag is damned ridiculous) and headed to the store.

As we pulled into the parking lot I remembered that I had not a cent on me; no worries though, I always have money in my car.  Except, I didn’t have money in my car.  So I started counting out change.  Alex was like, “Oh my God mom, really?  You’re gonna pay with change?  This is so embarrassing!”

(hahaha in all honesty I would’ve been mortified at her age, too)

The best part was – even my change was low – only had $1.75 in quarters, the rest was nickels and dimes.  As we walked into the store Alex said, “Please don’t let me know anybody in here…  If one of those Weaver boys from high school is in here I’ll die.”

“The high school Weaver boys are cute huh?”

“Oh yeah…”

“Ok, if we see one of them tell me and we’ll just walk right out and go to Sheetz for milk.”

In that we didn’t see a high school Weaver boy, we got our milk and headed to the self checkout (‘Mom… I don’t want the cashier knowing we’re poor’) – as I dropped nickels into the machine she rolled her eyes and looked around like she was stealing something.  The icing on the cake was how slowly the change registered – we had to wait 5 or 10 seconds for each coin to make it’s way through the machine then come to rest before we could insert the next coin; Alex was growing increasingly distraught.

As the “amount due” continued it’s downward spiral with each coin it suddenly dawned on her… “OH MY GOD MOM!  WE’RE GETTING.CHANGE.BACK??????????????”

 

 

Ohhhh the Abbers………..

Ol’ #3 is… uh…. wild; damn it, she’s wild – ain’t no gettin’ around it.  (It’s been rumored that she is me…  I don’t believe it for a second).

A few days before Dan and I left for vacation Pop told Abs he had stocked up on most of the essentials (he told ME, “I brought in 2 pallets of food – hopefully that’ll get us through Tuesday…”) but he needed to know how she stood on liquor and cigarettes.  Abby looked him square in the eye and said, “I think I’ll be good on beer but we may need to get me some cigs, Pop.”

Sunday she cut a straw in half and marveled at how much it resembled “one of those long cigarettes they used in the olden days.”  She was asking me the name of the long cigarettes (which I didn’t know) and then said, “well, whatever they are called; they were cool and now I’m going to do rings.”  First, I was caught up in trying to figure out how she knows about smoke rings and then I found myself lost in awe of her technique…

Today she called me 5 times about Dr. Seuss Day tomorrow – the first of those calls went like this:

Abs: momma, if I pay you back will you go to the Dollar Store and get some hair spray paint for me?  Tomorrow is Dr. Seuss Day at school and I thought about dressing up like a character but I think I’d rather just be mismatched ’cause Dr. Seuss was mismatchy so I think I’ll wear my hair in 2 ponytails and paint each one a different color then I thought about one tall sock and one short but I think I’ll go both tall but with different patterns and maybe shorts but I’m planning on wearing a long sleeve shirt and long sleeves with shorts doesn’t seem right so I’m gonna hafta figure out the bottoms but mostly I just need for you to get me the hair paint ’cause Katelyn got some and we want to be twins so will you get that for me when you’re finished with work?

Me: sure thing doll.  Ya know what would be fun?  We could do a pony tail on one side and a braid on the other…

Abs: mom… I wanna look mismatched not stupid.